Ahhh, the joys of sex…or not being able to get any.
I hope that I don’t offend anyone with this post. If so, don’t take it personal.
I want to talk about something that has been somewhat of an ‘issue’ recently. Not a big issue, but an issue none the less.
When I was younger, it was rare to come across dudes who had…..issues in the bedroom (in case you’re wondering what I’m speaking of, I’m talking about erectile dysfunction). I could have sex for what seemed like hours, and life was grand. I did come across one or two dudes who would…go soft in the middle of sex, and then attempt to ram a soft penis into my apple pie hole—that would only leave me feeling—sad. I’m serious, after getting my hopes up of a great night of sex, I would get a little sad and depressed because—the anticipation of a great night of sex never materialized.
Nowadays….sex is different. I tend to date men who are older than me, so…I’ve come to realize that erectile dysfunction is more common than not for me nowdays. Maybe it’s because I live in a party city and there’s a lot of alcohol consumption going on. I dunno.
Well, my question is…..is it okay to suggest a supplement?? Is it taboo for me to say, “your stamina is not quite what it used to be…” Okay, I wouldn’t be that frank about it, but is it okay or not okay to make that suggestion? I know that sex is greatly linked to a man’s ego, and to suggest that he’s not quite ‘hitting the mark’ is a blow to the ego so…….what is a girl to do??!! Now, I’m not afraid to say what I want and don’t want in bed, but how do you tell someone that erectile dysfunction is a problem?
My friend invited a few of us over for dinner last night. I was preparing mashed potatoes in the kitchen, when Mike walked through the door. At first, everything was great. We all sat down for dinner, then Mike and I refilled our wine glasses and ventured upstairs to the game room. We talked, joked and flirted with each other for a while, then I tried to turn the topic back to him. By now he’s grinning at me, flirting with his eyes.
“If you ever feel like being naughty, just call me, and I’ll be happy to do that with you as well.”
After a while, he asked me to refill his drink, and I did. When I returned upstairs, he had relocated to the bedroom.
He was on the bed face down, with his face in his hands. Since I’m unsure of what’s going on, I just figured I’d follow his lead, rather than jump all over him (like I wanted to). I kissed him on his ear, and I plopped down on the bed beside him. He gave me a weird look like “what are you doing” lol because I guess normally I would have been all over him, but I wasn’t last night. We laid beside each other for a good while, just chit-chatting, and then he stopped talking abruptly and looked at me. We sat in silence for a moment, and then I asked “what do you want”–I was kind of tired of us beating around the bush, and I really was unsure of what he wanted to do–he still was lying next to me with his head in his hands like he was contemplating life or death (okay, that could be an exaggeration, but you get the picture).
“I want you to rub my back.”
“Okay.” And that I did. I worked his muscles until he started breathing heavily–I could tell he was dozing off. After what seemed like forever, I leaned over and whispered “what do you want now” in his ear.
“I want to turn over.” He rolled over onto his back, and I was happy to see his erection.
“And here, I’m thinking you had fallen asleep on me. You’re very much awake.”
“Rub it for me.”
That’s where I’ll cut off the explicit details–since I’m a state of confusion, I’m not trying to paint the picture of a happy ending to my night.
I was confused. The entire time, I wasn’t asking him ‘what he wants’ to be seductive, or submissive, or to be a considerate lover–I was asking because I DID NOT KNOW!!! When we were just talking, he was flirting with me, but after he moved to the bedroom, he made no moves WHATSOEVER. NONE. ZIP. NADA. I didn’t know if he wanted me or not. It’s almost like the fire that used to blaze between us has burned down to a flicker.
I know he knew I was horny, but you know what? He received oral, and I received nothing. NOTHING. After he had his orgasm, a few minutes later, he put his clothes on. I guess I’m frustrated because he’s been semi-non responsive to my advances. In all honesty, I’m tired of making the first move sexually. He used to at least show some interest in having sex–it’s not there anymore. I know that Mike and I are way more than just sex, but dammit, this man knew I wanted him last night, and he didn’t give me anything. NOTHING. NADA.
We went back downstairs, and the music was playing from the stereo. Mike pulled me to him to dance, but I was non responsive to anything he was doing or saying–it wasn’t on purpose. I had a LONG day at work, so I was just not in a jovial mood after my semi-rejection. After he saw in my face that I was no longer smiling ear to ear (like I usually do when he’s around), he gave me a strange look, and he let me go. We went into the kitchen, and even Our Friend gave me a strange look like ‘what happened.’ I was not saying a word to anybody. I wasn’t mad, I just felt rejected. I would have been happier if we had just stayed in the game room talking, rather than leave unsatisfied.
I guess Mike picked up on my mood. I think he knew how I felt–I could see it in his face when I looked at him. We just stood looking at each other in complete silence for what seemed like forever. He finally spoke and told me he was leaving, so I leaned in to give him an one-arm hug. He grabbed me wrapped both of his arms around me, but I didn’t respond. He let me go, and looked in my face, and I walked off to get my things, as I was headed home myself.
If anything, I feel like I belong in that new movie “He’s Just Not That Into You”.
**After re-reading my post, I am laughing at myself because I sound like a spoiled brat because I didn’t get an orgasm!! **